A life filled with grief is no way to live. But it’s how I have lived for years now. My marriage ended. My daughter was diagnosed with numerous physical, and mental health issues. My mother’s health is failing, and will result in an early death. My own health has taken serious blows. My whole life has been turned upside down.
It leaves a person with choices. Do I stay in that grief forever? Do I learn to walk forward? The answer is a bit of both. Grief is necessary to heal brokenness. With out it we just bury our hurt, and become bitter. But moving on is essential too. Celebrating the successes in our lives. Learning new ways to live, and be happy, and bring change about in a way that heals our lives is so important. Here is how I do it.
Feel the grief. Let yourself cry. Be alone when it hurts to breathe. Use calming techniques when necessary. Write, pray, meditate, work, do the things that bring comfort. Talk to other people (I am so bad at doing this!). Open up, and share the hurt with those who love you.
Also, share the successes in your life. I was recently asked to guest post for an online magazine. I got rid of more things that were cluttering up my house. Minimalism, here I come! I was asked to cater an event for 100 people. I have made more time for reading, studying, and working on my craft. My knitting business will be featured in a local shop.
There are areas that are successful, and areas that I grieve loss so much. It’s. important to look at both. To see the bad, and the good, because it is not one or the other. Life has to include both. To acknowledge the pain, and the joy. Focusing on just one will lead to an unbalanced life of hardship, and constant unrest. We need to see both sides, and deal with or celebrate them as they come.
We need to live a full life, and that means living both grief, and success. If you aren’t doing both, then your life will always be a disappointment to you. Because when life is all grief it rots you, and leaves you unable to see the beauty in this world. When life is all good it will leave you feeling insecure, and unable to cope when bad things do happen. We need both. Embrace both.
What are you doing for the grief in your life? How are you celebrating the success?